ULLAMBANA, PRAYERS FOR THE DECEASED, AND FILIAL GRATITUDE IN THE LIGHT OF THE DHAMMA

 
Every year, when the fifteenth day of the seventh lunar month arrives, many people go to temples, make offerings, burn joss paper, and perform ceremonies or prayers for deceased parents and relatives. Alongside these practices, the story of Venerable Mahāmoggallāna — known as Mục Kiền Liên in Vietnamese and Maudgalyāyana in Sanskrit traditions — rescuing his mother is often told as the foundation of the Ullambana season.

But if we want to understand this subject through Right View, we should not begin by attacking a tradition. Nor should we assume that a custom must be the Buddha’s teaching simply because it has been practiced for a long time.

The questions we need to ask are much simpler:

What do the Pāḷi scriptures actually say about kamma, the deceased, giving, the dedication of merit, and gratitude toward one’s parents?

And more importantly:

When we face the death of someone we love, what is actually happening within our own mind?

1. First, We Must Distinguish Culture, Tradition, and What the Scriptures Actually Teach

The Ullambana Sūtra is not part of the Pāḷi Tipiṭaka. Therefore, we cannot take the story found in that text and automatically present it as a discourse belonging to the Pāḷi Nikāyas.

But we must also be careful not to go too far in the opposite direction.

“Not found in the Pāḷi Tipiṭaka” does not automatically mean “the entire story was certainly invented in China.”

These are two entirely different claims.

To determine the historical development of the Ullambana Sūtra, one would need to examine its textual history, Chinese translations, traditions associated with Maudgalyāyana/Mahāmoggallāna, related Indian sources where available, and the broader process through which Buddhism developed within East Asian cultures.

A more careful statement, therefore, would be:

The Ullambana observances widely practiced today in Vietnam and other parts of East Asia cannot simply be identified, in their present cultural form, with a ritual described in the Pāḷi Nikāyas.

This distinction needs to be clear before we go any further.

2. Kamma Is Not a Debt That Someone Else Can Pay for You

More important than the historical question of Ullambana is the principle of kamma.

In the Cūḷakammavibhaṅga Sutta — the Shorter Discourse on the Analysis of Kamma, MN 135 — the Buddha teaches that beings are owners of their kamma, heirs to their kamma; kamma is their origin, their relative, and their refuge; kamma distinguishes beings as inferior and superior.

This needs to be understood correctly.

Kamma is not a sentence handed down by an external god.

Nor is kamma a kind of “sin” that can be settled by bringing money, offerings, or rituals as payment.

Kamma is fundamentally connected with intention — cetanā.

When a person intentionally kills, steals, deceives, harms others, or continually nourishes greed, hatred, and delusion, that intentional process of mind is creating causes.

When the necessary conditions come together, corresponding results may arise.

So the real question is not:

“Who has enough spiritual power to erase my kamma?”

The question should be:

“What kind of kamma am I creating right now?”

If person A creates unwholesome kamma, we cannot simply take a ritual performed by person B and turn it into the following equation:

A does not need to change anything, yet A’s unwholesome kamma is erased.

If prayers or ceremonies for the deceased are understood in this way, then that mechanism does not accord with the principle of kamma presented in the Nikāyas.

3. Then Does Making Merit for the Deceased Have Any Meaning?

Yes.

But we need to understand the mechanism correctly. Otherwise, we can easily turn the Dhamma into something resembling a system for transferring material goods between two worlds.

One particularly important source is the Jāṇussoṇi Sutta, AN 10.177.

In this discourse, the question of giving for deceased relatives is addressed directly.

An important point is that the dead are not described as though everyone, regardless of where they have been reborn, is simply waiting for the living to send merit to them.

The discourse distinguishes different destinations of rebirth and indicates that there are circumstances in which an offering does not reach the deceased relative, while there is a particular class of departed beings for whom such an offering can be of benefit.

But there is another important detail that is often overlooked:

If the deceased relative is not in a state where that offering can reach them, the act of giving performed by the living is still not wasted.

The wholesome kamma remains with the person who performs the wholesome action.

This is extremely important.

The Dhamma does not teach a spiritual banking system in which living people “transfer merit points” from their own account into the account of someone who has died.

Still less does it teach that burning an object in this world causes that object to appear in another world.

When explaining the traditional Theravāda understanding of rejoicing in shared merit — pattānumodanā — we should clearly distinguish this later or traditional explanatory framework from what AN 10.177 itself explicitly states. We should not turn every detail of a traditional explanation into the direct words of the Buddha.

4. Is Burning Joss Paper Solving a Problem for the Dead — or for the Living?

This is where we need to turn back and look at our own mind.

A person’s father has just died.

The child is devastated and begins to think:

“Where is my father now?”

Then:

“Is he hungry?”

“Does he have somewhere to live?”

“Does he have money?”

“I have to do something for him.”

So the person buys paper houses, paper cars, paper clothes, and spirit money, and burns them.

If we stand outside the situation and simply say:

“Superstition!”

then we have seen only the behavior.

We have not yet seen the cause behind the behavior.

Look more deeply.

Behind it there may be love.

But within that love there may also be craving.

Because there is craving, when death takes away the person we love, the mind suffers.

Because it suffers, the mind wants to do something that restores the feeling:

“I can still protect this person.”

But death confronts us with a truth that is extremely difficult to accept:

There are things and people we love deeply, yet we cannot possess them, keep them, or control what happens to them.

Right here, without Right View, the mind easily searches for something else to hold on to.

And ritual can become an object of clinging:

“I must do this or my father will not be at peace.”

“I must offer this or my mother will have no money.”

“If I do not perform this ceremony, my relative will not be liberated.”

Fear gives rise to the need for control.

The need for control gives rise to attachment to a method.

And when people are deeply afraid, anyone who promises:

“Give me money, perform this ceremony, and I will take care of the other world for you”

can easily find people willing to believe them.

So the deepest question is not merely:

“Is burning joss paper right or wrong?”

It is:

“What is happening in the mind that needs joss paper in order to feel safe?”

5. If We Do Not Burn Joss Paper, What Can We Do for Parents Who Have Died?

Do something that is unquestionably wholesome here and now.

Give generously.

Keep the precepts.

Help people in need.

Care for the sick.

Support sincere practitioners of the Dhamma.

Do not kill.

Do not deceive.

Do not commit unwholesome actions for the sake of money.

Do not allow brothers and sisters to become enemies over inheritance after their parents die.

Then remember your parents with gratitude.

The important point is:

Do not let love for the dead become a condition for creating more unwholesome kamma among the living.

Some families hold enormous funerals while brothers and sisters fight over every piece of property.

Some people spend large amounts of money on ceremonies for parents who have died, yet when those parents were alive, they could not find the time to sit down and share a meal with them.

Some burn paper mansions for their parents but cannot keep even the Five Precepts in their own lives.

If that is the case, the real issue is not whether the offering is large or small.

The issue is:

What kind of causes is the mind creating?

6. The Deepest Expression of Gratitude to Our Parents Must Be Practiced While They Are Still Alive

This deserves serious reflection.

We often wait until our parents die before asking:

“How can I save my parents?”

But why not ask that question while they are still alive?

While our parents are alive, we can take them to see a doctor.

We can buy their medicine.

We can care for them.

We can apologize.

We can forgive.

We can sit down and share a meal with them.

We can help them become less angry.

We can encourage them to practice generosity.

We can help them keep the precepts.

We can help them encounter the true Dhamma and develop Right View.

This is the time when we can directly help change the conditions within which our parents are living.

But one thing must always be remembered:

A child cannot practice in place of their parents.

A child can only help create supportive conditions.

Parents must still create kamma through their own body, speech, and mind.

This is the beauty of filial gratitude in accordance with the Dhamma:

We do not claim ownership over the kamma of those we love, but we wholeheartedly help create conditions in which they can establish wholesome causes for themselves.

7. Do Not Turn Kamma Into Fatalism

The statement “each person experiences the results of their own kamma” can also be misunderstood.

It does not mean:

“They are suffering because of their kamma, so leave them alone.”

That is not Right View.

If someone is hungry and we give them food, our act of helping becomes a new condition in that person’s life.

If our parents are angry and we know how to speak in a way that helps their anger settle, that too is a condition.

If someone is about to perform an unwholesome action and a good spiritual friend helps them reconsider, the network of causes and conditions has already changed.

Kamma, therefore, is not a closed and predetermined destiny.

The Dhamma does not teach us to stand with folded arms in the face of suffering.

On the contrary, understanding cause and effect teaches us:

If we want the result to change, we must work with the causes and conditions that can be changed now.

8. Do Not Use the Dhamma as a Weapon Against Others

There is another very subtle trap.

A person may once have been attached to rituals.

After studying the Nikāyas, that person abandons those rituals.

But then another form of attachment appears:

“I follow the true Dhamma.”

“Those people are superstitious.”

“I understand the early teachings. They do not.”

The ritual may have been abandoned.

But clinging may not have been abandoned.

It has simply changed its object.

Before, ritual became part of “me.”

Now scriptural knowledge becomes part of “me.”

From this sense that “I am right” can come contempt, anger, argument, and the desire to defeat others.

If studying the Dhamma causes greed, hatred, and delusion to increase, then we need to examine the way we are using the Dhamma.

The Dhamma is not a stick for beating other people.

It is a mirror for looking at greed, hatred, and delusion within this very mind.

9. How, Then, Should We Understand the Ullambana Season?

There is no need to turn the fifteenth day of the seventh lunar month into a cultural war.

If that day causes someone who has been busy with life to suddenly remember:

“My parents are getting old.”

and that person goes home to visit them,

that is wholesome.

If that day causes someone to remember deceased parents and then become more generous, keep the precepts, and live a better life,

that too is wholesome.

If a temple uses the occasion to teach people about gratitude, kamma, impermanence, and Right View,

that can become a beneficial condition.

But if it develops into the belief that:

Simply paying for a ceremony can erase kamma or guarantee liberation for another person,

then that belief needs to be examined again through Right View.

Do not begin by asking:

“Which Buddhist tradition does this ritual belong to?”

Ask instead:

“What qualities of mind is this practice nourishing?”

If an action increases generosity, virtue, gratitude, wisdom, and reduces greed, hatred, and delusion, recognize those wholesome qualities.

If it nourishes fear, superstition, craving, dependency, spiritual display, the commercialization of religion, or the wrong view that kamma can be bought, sold, or erased by someone else, recognize those qualities for what they are.

10. The Final Question Is Not Really About Ullambana

One day, our parents will die.

And one day, we too will die.

This is not pessimism.

It is reality.

So before asking:

“What ceremony should I perform after my parents die?”

ask today:

How am I treating my parents while they are still alive?

And before asking:

“Who will pray for me after I die?”

ask:

What kind of kamma am I creating right now?

When anger arises, do I see anger?

When greed arises, do I see greed?

When I want to control another person, do I recognize that desire to control?

When I lose something or someone I love, can I see how craving develops into clinging and then into suffering?

This is where the Dhamma needs to be seen.

Not only in some world after death.

Right here, within this body and mind.

Conclusion

The Dhamma does not teach us to be ungrateful toward those who have died.

Nor does it teach us to become cold and indifferent in the face of death.

On the contrary, precisely because we understand impermanence, we should love and care while there is still time to love and care.

Precisely because we understand kamma, we should help one another establish wholesome causes while there is still an opportunity to do so.

Precisely because no one can live for us, practice for us, or bear our kamma in our place, we should value every opportunity to create supportive conditions for one another.

While your parents are alive:

Care for them.

If your parents have not yet understood wholesome ways of living:

Skillfully create conditions that may help them understand.

If your parents have died:

Do wholesome deeds, live wholesomely, and remember them with gratitude — but do not allow love to become superstition.

And for yourself:

Do not wait until death to look for someone to save you.

Right now, look and see what is arising.

What conditions gave rise to it?

What is the mind holding on to?

Where is greed?

Where is hatred?

Where is delusion?

How is craving leading to clinging?

And at the very point where an unwholesome cause is clearly seen and is no longer continually nourished, another direction has already begun.

That is filial gratitude guided by Right View.

And at a deeper level, it is the beginning of taking responsibility for one’s own kamma and one’s own path beyond suffering.